Name. Communicative exercise “Imposing states”
Purpose.
Group psychological training procedure. Participants learn to resist manipulation of their condition.
One of the favorite techniques of manipulators is imposing states. This is usually done in order to bring a person out of balance, and then impose on him the direction of action desired by the manipulator. It's done something like this:
Why are you sitting so sad?
I'm not sad.
No, sad. His forehead wrinkled...
I'm just thinking.
But it seems to me that you are thinking about something of your own. Did you quarrel with your wife again?
I didn't quarrel. There's just a lot of work, and there's no time for fun.
Ah-ah-ah. I told you you were sad. Don't be sad, look at the world more broadly.
Look! He turned completely pale! Let's go, have some tea and talk...
Well... Anyway, work isn't going well. Let's go to.
Behind the outward harmlessness lies an obvious manipulation:
There was an imposition of feelings that were not there before,
Appeal to the fictional “forehead wrinkled”, “turned pale”,
Disequilibrium, goal setting disorder,
Imposing the goal “let’s go have tea.”
Two volunteers are called. The presenter assigns one person the role of manipulator. The second is victims. The task of the “manipulator” is to impose on the “victim” one state or another (which one is up to him to decide). This is achieved not through role-playing, but “here and now.” The presenter and other participants watch. If it becomes obvious that the “victim” is truly unbalanced, and very unbalanced, the leader stops the exercise.
Next, the participants are divided into threes using lots. In these threes, the first numbers will play the role of manipulators, the second - victims, and the third - observers. The exercise takes place in threes. Meanwhile, the presenter carefully monitors the condition of the participants.
At the end there is a discussion. Observers make their reports first. They describe in detail everything that they were able to notice in the behavior of the “manipulator” and the “victim”. The following is a general discussion:
How to recognize that an alien state is being imposed on you?
What is the best way to resist such manipulation?
1. Communicative exercise “Imposing states” [ Electronic resource] // A. Ya.. 11.29.2012..html (11.29.2012).
- "The wind of change"
- “Mine doesn’t understand yours”
- “I didn’t really want to”
- "Ocean"
- "Apotheosis of the Absurd"
- "The whole world is a theater"
One of important properties mature man with high level development of intelligence, emotional sphere and others important qualities successful personality - the ability to defend against psychological attacks of ill-wishers. The balance of emotions is an important defensive fortress that an envious person or competitor seeks to destroy. After all, if you make a person angry, he immediately loses the ability to think logically, make informed decisions, and see the pitfalls in the actions of other people.
Hurting words, reproaches, nagging, spreading gossip and other methods of psychological attack act like bee venom - if a person is stung by one or more bees, then nothing bad will happen to him. But if he is attacked by a whole swarm, the one under attack may even die. It’s the same with emotional attacks from enemies - one injection may not enrage the opponent, but if you annoy him over and over again, the bullying tactics will bear fruit. The stronger the psychological sphere is protected, the more “bee stings” a person can withstand. But there are also those who are like allergy sufferers - even one portion of poison completely unsettles them and even threatens their lives, they are so unprotected from external attacks.
They can remain greenhouse flowers for the rest of their lives and be protected from contact with aggressive individuals, or they can learn the necessary techniques psychological protection and become stronger opponents in this bloodless war.
Most prestigious and highly paid professions involve working with people, so clashes with hostile and even inappropriate characters are inevitable. If you have chosen the path through thorns to the stars of high achievements, then you should take utmost care in strengthening the approaches to your nerves. Otherwise, they will be bullied by all and sundry.
A strong psyche depends on the innate qualities of a person, his upbringing, worldview, understanding of the psychology of other people, attentiveness, and the ability to analyze the behavior and motives of opponents.
First of all, you need to learn to understand that a person goes on a psychological attack when he has no other way to prove that he is right, such as facts, evidence, legal norms. When the opponent cannot do anything in more effective and obvious ways, he takes the only remaining opportunity - to irritate the opponent so that he surrenders under the pressure of emotional attacks. Therefore, you need to have a stable position, realize that you are right from a moral and legal point of view, have firm confidence in the unshakability of your opinion and understand that the enemy will not be able to get you in any other way than psychological bullying. This means you need to be prepared for this and perceive attacks as unfair play. weak person- after all, a strong and fair person will not stoop to such a thing. Such an attitude puts you in the position of an elephant, at which the annoying Moska barks - he barks, but he can’t do anything.
And to make it easier to cope with aggressive ill-wishers, use the following methods of psychological defense, which have been tested in psychological trainings and have shown their effectiveness in real life.
"The wind of change"
Remember which words, facial expressions or intonations are the most painful for you, how you can be guaranteed to get angry or depressed. Remember and vividly imagine a situation where the offender is trying to anger you with similar techniques. Say to yourself the most offensive words that can hurt you, visualize the expression on your opponent’s face that drives you crazy.
Feel the state of anger or, conversely, confusion that such behavior causes in you. Feel it inside yourself, break it down into separate emotions and sensations. What do you feel? It could be a rapid heartbeat, you feel feverish, or maybe your legs are paralyzed, your thoughts are confused, tears come to your eyes. Remember these feelings well. Now imagine that you are standing in a strong wind, and it blows away both the words of the offender and the responses negative emotions. You see how he screams and swears, but all this is useless, because his scream and your reaction to his anger flies away with the wind.
Do this exercise in a quiet environment several times, and you will feel that you are calmer about such attacks in your direction. And when faced with this situation in real life, again imagine that you are standing on strong wind and the words of the offender, along with your emotions, fly to the side without causing harm.
“Mine doesn’t understand yours”
If you are in an unpleasant situation, people are shouting at you, swearing at you and hurling insults at you, then imagine that you are deaf or have loud music on your headphones. Imagine that you don’t hear this person at all, he opens his mouth, waves his arms, his face is distorted with a grimace of anger, and you are surrounded by calm water in which you sway peacefully, like seaweed, and do not react to external stimuli. Words cannot affect you, they do not penetrate your consciousness, because you do not hear them. Observing such calm, the enemy will quickly become exhausted, and you will be able to turn the situation in your favor.
"Kindergarten, nursery group"
If you imagine that your enemies are three-year-old, unintelligent kids, then you can learn not to treat their attacks so painfully. Imagine that you are a teacher, and your opponents are children from a kindergarten group. They run, scream, are capricious, indignant... But is it possible to be offended by them?
Detail the situation, imagine how the enemies fall clumsily, angrily tear toys, babble their childish curses, whine. You must be calm and balanced, because this moment You are the only adequate person among those present. Thinking this way, it is impossible to take attempts to insult or humiliate seriously - they will only cause mild irony.
“I didn’t really want to”
IN this method it is proposed to put oneself in the place of the fox from the fable “The Fox and the Grapes” - having failed to get what it wanted, the animal simply convinced itself of its unimportance, so as not to be upset. In a situation where a friend or just a good acquaintance suddenly finds himself in the enemy’s camp, it is better to simply convince yourself that his opinion is not so important, his support is not so necessary, and his attacks are acid and unripe grapes, because of which you still don’t want to see him among your friends. It is known that the most painful blows are dealt to us by those whom we trust. If this happens, it is better not to perceive it as a tragedy, but to act like a fox, saying: “He was not such a close friend to me.”
"Ocean"
Seas and oceans receive the waters of stormy rivers, but at the same time remain majestically calm. Likewise, in any situation, you are able, like the ocean, to remain calm even when stormy streams of abuse are pouring out on you.
"Apotheosis of the Absurd"
This method of psychological defense is that the situation must be brought to the point of absurdity, after which it cannot be taken seriously either by the instigators of the conflict or by its intended victim. Most often, the aggressor starts from afar - hints, makes careful attacks, observing the person’s reaction. In this case, it is necessary to immediately exaggerate the situation to such a degree of delirium that it turns out to be bizarrely and unnaturally inflated, and any attacks in this direction only cause laughter and irony.
"The whole world is a theater"
There are always people around us against whom we are emotionally unstable. Gather them on one stage of an imaginary puppet theater and act out a funny performance in your head with the participation of these people. Bring to the fore their most stupid, funny and absurd characteristics - greed, untidiness, arrogance, vanity. Make them victims of your shortcomings. Make you do funny things and look comical. The main thing is that they start making you laugh. Then, when you meet them, you will no longer be shy and afraid to fight back.
These methods and techniques of psychological defense will help you learn to stop the emotional attacks of your opponents, so as not to become a hostage to your own psychological weakness and instability against aggressive and hostile people.
Today we will share with you cool and useful psychological tricks. They really work. Before we begin, we want to say: we do not condone the actions of people who resort to manipulation to achieve goals. However, there are a lot of tricks you need to know about. They will be very useful in life. Other people can manipulate you for their own benefit (all advertising marketing is built on similar principles). Our next selection, especially for you, contains the most effective psychological tricks.
Present
Even a small gift can touch a person to the core
Numerous studies have shown that by offering someone even the smallest souvenir, you can radically change their attitude towards you.
Passive voice
You should not use the method of direct accusation in communication: it causes a reflexive denial in the interlocutor
In order not to enter into confrontation with your interlocutor, but to convey your opinion, use the passive (passive) voice in your speech. For example, instead of “You didn't send me the spreadsheet,” say “No spreadsheets were sent.”
Ten minute appointment
Sometimes the brain “deceives” us, causing us to feel lazy and unwilling to do something. But in the process of work, this feeling can be replaced by interest and activity.
Don't feel motivated to do some work? Then still force yourself to do it for at least 10 minutes. Even if you can't continue, 10 minutes is better than nothing.
Be confident
People often mistake a self-confident person for an authoritative person with leadership qualities.
Behave like a person who knows what he is doing - and others will trust you. Of course, this trick cannot be used for illegal purposes. And yet, it has been verified: in difficult situations this trick really works.
Fear of loss
People are afraid of losing something. That’s why advertising “two seats left on the left” is so successful when selling bus tickets. The same principle is used for sales stability - it motivates people to buy a product. Remember this trick and you will not become a victim of manipulation.
The illusion of choice
The illusion of choice is considered an illusion because its main goal is manipulation, where, with any choice, the initiator of the game wins
Do you need to force a lazy co-worker or child to do something? Give them a fake choice! What does it mean? If you need to sweep the floor and fold laundry, simply ask, “Do you want to fold or sweep?” They will gain a sense of control and will get to work with more enthusiasm.
Method "Door in the face"
The person feels uncomfortable refusing a request; and therefore he is happy to help if the requirements are significantly reduced
This marketing trick says: first demand from a person what is unattainable, and then demand what you really want. In other words, if you want a puppy, ask for a pony first.
"Kick in the door" technique
Having trained someone to provide small services, it is not difficult to motivate him to do something grandiose. A person gets used to the fact that he is obliged to help
This trick is the antithesis of the "door in the face." If you ask for small favors, then later people will be inclined to do larger things for you.
Silence is gold
People are afraid of long pauses during conversations. It is enough just to remember the painful moments when festive table silence hangs
Do you need to find out more information about someone, or want to make a profitable deal? Silence will help with this. Pauses in communication will cause a feeling of awkwardness, and your interlocutor will involuntarily strive to fill them.
Open body language
One of the main signs of a person’s openness is arms spread out to the sides, palms facing up.
To look more confident, use the language of open gestures and poses in a given situation. Try not to cross your arms over your chest, use an open gaze, and so on.
"Mirror" method
Everyone admires the positive traits in others that they themselves possess. But we also hate in others what we feel in ourselves.
By slightly imitating a person, you can tune in “to his wavelength,” arousing his affection for you. Just don’t overdo it, so as not to seem strange and alienate your interlocutor.
Small services
The desire to be needed and involved in a group of other people has been genetically embedded in us since the beginning of humanity.
When you ask for something, or other people ask you, everyone gets the feeling of being needed. This expression of favor promotes rapprochement between people. Of course, we are talking about small benefits, and it is important not to overdo it.
Agree
Base your communication on what you have in common with your opponent; this way you can come to a mutually beneficial agreement
This can be a powerful weapon, especially if you are against it. Be sure to find first mutual language with your interlocutor. For example: “I agree with you, but...”, or: “I understand this, however...”
Tom Sawyer Method
Get interested and make it work - effective method, which is very actively used in control theory
The famous hero of Mark Twain's novel used a wise psychological trick. What is it? If you don't want to do something, pretend that the work is interesting and fun. Perhaps someone will be inspired and do it for you?
Admit your mistakes
By exposing yourself for small shortcomings, you give others a sense of greatness; such a self-critical person is ready to forgive a lot
A good way to build trust is to admit your mistakes, especially small ones. It is also strategically correct (albeit incorrect from an ethical point of view) to take blame for an offense that you did not commit. Using this method increases the degree of trust in a person in the future.
Maintain Neutrality
A balanced approach to all aspects of a problem helps solve it more effectively
This method is one of best secrets beliefs in the world. Show your interlocutor that you are ready to accept various reasoned arguments, and he will have more reasons to trust you.
Appraising glance
The main thing when meeting suspicious individuals is not to show fear
If you often walk around the city, this technique may come in handy. When you see someone suspicious, catch their eye (but don't look threatening). Now look down at your feet, and then again at your eyes. As a result, quickly look away and continue on your way. This silent “assessment” will send a signal that you did not see the person as a threat. PS: this method will work well if you have a confident step and stately posture. But even if you consider yourself short, imagine yourself big and strong, this will help in this situation.
Don't argue about the main issue
Competent discussion helps in solving many, even the most global, problems
If you are in a negotiation, don't argue with your core point. It’s better to move straight to the secondary arguments. For example: you want to build a wall. Don't argue about whether it will be built or not. Immediately address the question of who will pay for the construction. Then people will consider the very existence of the wall as a necessity.
Smile for a child
Azami nonverbal interaction with others the baby has almost from birth
Have you ever been stopped on the street to ask something very “inappropriate”?
I was going down an escalator in a stuffy shopping center. I was already quite tired of this Moscow heat; steamed and in some places even wet, I stepped onto the solid ground, trying to extinguish the energy given to my body by the moving belt. If her speed had been a little higher, I definitely would not have been able to dodge the tall girl in the scary granny-like glasses. The girl, it seemed, did not feel any danger threatening her - she tamed the fairies, who, by the magic of her hands, flew up and down.
Do you believe in God? - someone’s voice was heard from the left in the noise of the shopping center.
At that moment I felt that all shopping mall suddenly fell silent. And only the fairy continued to fly up and down - the noise of the motor was completely inappropriately exposed, revealing the terrible truth: “If you buy a fairy, then this buzzing will piss off any parent in a maximum of 5 minutes.” Having had time to think this, I turned my gaze to the left - to where the strange question came from.
To be honest, I am angry at the unceremonious invasion of my personal space. And here even a basic “hello” did not precede this “hit on the head.” Without stopping, I said: “Yes.”
My answer disappointed my unexpected interlocutor. But, apparently, he was not often given answers, so he quickly came to his senses and decided that since such drinking had begun, then anything was possible: “Do you know our Lord, Jesus Christ, personally?”
I stopped and turned around. On the one hand, I felt sorry for the brother who chose such a difficult method of evangelism, on the other hand, I wanted to see what the reaction was when the answer to his question was positive.
Yes, I said.
My short-term interlocutor somehow immediately became upset. Hearing a sluggish: “Oh, yes? Thank God!”, I said goodbye and moved on. My personal space was successfully retaken this time. But there was a gap in the armor - I moved on, thinking about what had happened.
Is it really possible these days that someone else can be pulled out of the cocoon of their own life and invited to think about the eternal, simply by stopping at the escalator? Surely, this person has friends and relatives who need news about Christ and to whom he has not yet told everything and asked all the questions. Why is he here and not there? And the most main question, which I can't get rid of, why when I answered yes, he wasn't the least bit happy?
adminPerhaps you have noticed more than once that communication with some people leads to the appearance of irritability and apathy and weakening. If so, you have become a victim of a psychological attack. When you managed to suppress your interlocutor, provoke him to take the actions you wanted, force him to behave differently, then know that you were the source of the psychological attack.
What are psychological attacks, how do they manifest themselves and how can you protect yourself from them? Psychological attacks are actions or statements aimed at depriving others. Speaking vernacular, a person using psychological attack methods “muddies the waters”, trying to consciously “knock him out of the saddle” and extinguish the will of his interlocutor.
For use protective measures, first of all, you need to realize what they are doing to your psychological balance. The difficulty is that a psychological attack is not always carried out clearly and openly. It may not be noticeable outwardly and may occur in the process of expressing friendly advice, communication with the family, a positive conversation with a colleague, or philosophical reasoning.
Why are we being attacked?
What makes a person regularly use psychological attack methods? This is explained by the aggressor’s habit of following certain life scenarios. Let’s say that for some people things don’t work out, for others they face failures at every place of duty, and for others they are subject to constant attacks on the street. What are these patterns related to? A person becomes a magnet for the same type of troubles, and all because this is how he builds his behavior and energy field.
The source of a psychological attack must be sought in the psychological characteristics of the aggressor. The real reasons in life scenarios in which the victim and the attacker are accustomed to living. This form of behavior is caused by the susceptibility of the aggressor’s subconscious to impose a certain role on the victim in the usual scenario. The integrity of the attacked person is violated, and over time he enters into a symbiosis with the aggressor, being subjected to psychological attacks and playing the same role regularly. 
In addition to the psychological reason, there is also an energetic component. Interaction with others is accompanied by a process of energy exchange. It does not always have the same positive effect on both sides of the interaction. If a person is subjected to psychological attacks, his condition noticeably worsens after communicating with the aggressor.
Methods of psychological attack
Psychological attacks have several levels of manifestation. Let's take a closer look at each of the ways to remove a person from emotional balance and influence his mental background.
Psychological attack aimed at opinions and values. This method of influence is aimed at changing worldviews. A psychological attack on beliefs is based on the inability to understand the components of the imposed opinion. The aggressor speaks categorically towards the interlocutor. The purpose of such a statement is to draw the attention of the person being attacked to his own problems. This attack is characterized by arrogant shaking of the head, glaring at the victim, and analytical questions.
A psychological attack aimed at logic. This method aims to turn off the attacker’s serial communication. During the conversation, the aggressor uses complex terms that are unknown to the interlocutor. The attacker's speech stream includes complex designs, he talks at a fast pace. The result of a psychological attack aimed at logic is the fact that after a while the interlocutor becomes unable to critically assess the situation and the opponent’s statements. In addition, the aggressor may be proficient in techniques.
A psychological attack aimed at feelings and emotions. This method causes embarrassment to the interlocutor after speaking to him. Words that seem pleasant at first glance can cause embarrassment and make the interlocutor nervous. Another way psychological impact- a game of pity. The attacker tries to make the victim feel guilty with his behavior. The female half of humanity has mastered this method perfectly. Ladies do not hesitate to use the invocation of pity on men in combination with characteristic sobs and even tears.
Suppression of will by manifestation of force. The most common method of psychological attack. The suppression of will occurs clearly. The aggressor raises his voice, uses threatening
Psychological attack by manifestation of sexuality. The attacker makes signs at a time when the victim is not ready for it. The aggressor attacks with ambiguous jokes, vulgar phrases, indecent gestures and jokes addressed to the interlocutor. A nonverbal attack manifests itself in inviting glances and erotic body movements.
Knowing that a psychological attack is possible from your interlocutor, it is important to be able to defend yourself in the process of communicating with him.
Methods of psychological defense
The ability to defend against psychological attacks is a quality. Ill-wishers undermine emotional balance, so building a defensive wall from envious people and competitors is necessary. If you make a person angry and undermine his faith in own strength, he stops seeing the bad in people and is unable to think logically.
Reproaches, insults and other methods of psychological attack are similar to a bee sting. If one insect bites, there will be no harm, but if a whole swarm attacks, the person will suffer greatly. It’s exactly the same with psychological ones. One unpleasant statement may not attract attention, but regular attacks will do their job and psychological attacks will achieve their goal. But there are also people for whom even a single attack from an aggressor will be disastrous.
People are often susceptible to psychological attacks in the workplace, especially if their line of work involves communicating with others. A clash with aggressors is inevitable, so you need to study methods of defense in a bloodless war. If you plan to achieve a lot in life, you will have to learn how to communicate with people who attack your psychological balance.
First of all, you need to understand that people undertake methods of psychological attack, but they cannot prove their own innocence in any other way. When obvious ways The aggressor no longer has any influence on the person; he begins to act on the sly. The only way for him to achieve what he wants is to throw his opponent off balance.
There are several effective methods building a barricade against psychological attacks from envious people and enemies. So:
Find out what gestures, statements and intonation affect you Negative influence. Remember the situation and offensive words, imagine the facial expressions and gestures of your interlocutor that drive you crazy. Try to understand what you feel? Take these emotions apart. Someone feels uncontrollable anger, another gets a fever, and a third has wet eyes. Remember this feeling and imagine that you are standing in a strong wind. You can observe how intensely the offender makes you feel, but all his unpleasant words fly to the side without having an impact on you. This exercise can help you react indifferently to offensive words in a real situation.
Being in negative situation, imagine that you are deaf and do not hear offensive statements addressed to you. The aggressor may shout, behave inappropriately and be rude, but this should not have any influence on you. Tune in. Observing your calmness, the attacker will become exhausted, and you will turn the situation to your advantage.
Imagine the offender as a small child, then the painful perception of his words will not be so obvious. If you feel more mature and smarter than the aggressor, his attempts to humiliate or insult you will lead to nothing but irony.
If psychological methods influence of a close friend or family member, convince yourself that his point of view is not as significant for you as he would like. Remember that the most painful blows are dealt to us by those closest to us. By not reacting to them in the expected way, you will not only save your nerves, but also probably...
Bring the situation to the point of absurdity using the method of psychological aikido. Agree with your opponent's attacks and praise him. Finally, the situation will become so ridiculous that psychological attacks will be repelled.
These methods will help you not to succumb to the psychological attacks of aggressors and maintain mental balance and harmony with the world around you.
Summing up
Symptoms of a psychological attack:
After communication, you feel a loss of strength and drowsiness;
Feeling that your legs are not where they should be;
The world around feels unreal;
The field of vision is significantly narrowed;
Oppressive.
Ways to counter psychological attacks:
Do not listen to the words of the aggressor and then he will lose interest;
Don’t let yourself be convinced, stick to your own opinion in any situation;
Don't look the aggressor in the eye. Direct your gaze to the bridge of your nose;
Try to end the conversation as quickly as possible. Thank the interlocutor for his point of view, but do not be influenced by him;
Do not respond with a psychological attack to the aggressor’s provocations if you are not sure that you can win this emotional battle;
If among your loved ones there is a person who uses psychological attacks, limit communication with him. Your health is more important than feigned politeness.
16 February 2014, 12:01