How to stop being nervous about anything and flare up like a match

March 19, 2017 - 4 comments

Friends and acquaintances constantly tell you that you are an “impossible” person. You get nervous, twitch, and rage at every slightest reason. What is there! Sometimes you don't even need a reason. They stand in the wrong place, they call at the wrong time, they do the wrong things, they say the wrong things. Annoying, in a word. You burst into flames like straw.

As soon as you calm down, they piss you off again, make you angry, bother you. System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan will tell you how to stop being nervous about anything.

Why does it happen that you have to freak out? Obviously, it is external circumstances and other people that are the main reason. They make you nervous at home, they annoy you at work, they make you angry in transport. So what is it? How not to be nervous if life is like this?

And for some people, at least give them a diploma for “professional nerve-wracking.” Experts in their field. After meeting such people, it is difficult to quickly stop being nervous.

How can you learn not to worry about anything and for no reason? It seems that your nerves will soon run out and you will fall flat, exhausted. Tired of shaking, worrying, worrying, screaming.

Worrying and being nervous is almost a calling

You yourself don’t notice how your “nerve strings” are inflated, and your mind demands an immediate solution to the problem. Feverishly, thoughts begin to run from corner to corner, trying to sound an alarm to consciousness. There is contact. And then there is no way to calm down right now. Every day passes in some kind of internal tension.

At first glance, anxiety is explained quite simply. A great desire to always keep oneself safe in such dangerous world forces a person to be constantly on. But when your nervous system asks for mercy, and you suffer from yourself, then you need to do something urgently. Or strengthen nervous system, or see a psychologist, or both. Or open this article and see the reason and answer to the question of endless worries about any reason.

Who worries about any reason and for no reason

According to the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan, people with a visual vector are endowed with special impressionability, that is, the ability to take the smallest events to heart. These are the people they say about - they easily make mountains out of molehills. They tend to exaggerate everything that happens around them.

Endowed by nature with the ability, like a sponge, to absorb the sensually colored world around. They swing so skillfully on the swing of emotions that now they can cry, and a minute later they can smile with joy.

For any reason they can feel joy: “Look, what a colorful butterfly! How blue the sky is today!” and stretching out his arms to enjoy what he saw.

Often various fears have haunted them since childhood. Babayka, dogs, darkness, height, depth. They may be afraid before the exam...

Then in adult life, perhaps, they cease to be very afraid, but then they begin to worry about any reason. Their need to experience emotions at any cost encourages them to worry about any reason. Although it seems to them that they are completely reasonable to worry and want to improve the lives of themselves and their loved ones.

It is useless to give advice like stop worrying, because a visual person receives a surge of feelings from experiences. And it doesn’t matter that he doesn’t know how to do it in such an inept way. So it will cling, grab onto whatever it has to, and twitch for any reason.

Imagine a person who always has a thousand-fold magnifying glass with him and constantly looks at everything through it. Naturally, for him everything will be big, significant, even gigantic. And here is a man with such an impressionable psyche. For him, events are seen as large and dimensional. How can you not worry about anything?

How to stop worrying about anything

System-vector psychology Yuri Burlan says that while a person with a visual vector thinks about himself, about own safety and is exaggeratedly worried about any reason, then nothing will change. And if you change the accent - more often switch to the feelings of others, show natural empathy for people, turn to them sympathy, empathy, then hot temper and excessive anxiety will disappear. The internal desire to emote is wasted on others, bringing pleasure.

Becoming calmer is easier than it seems at first glance.

There are several other reasons why a person may be nervous and restless. System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan clearly shows the path to overcoming such difficulties. After all, it’s difficult to be tense around the clock and expect something terrible, to see the world in dangers and threats. People also worry a lot about their own stubbornness or inability to understand that they see other people through their own perceptions. Sometimes irritation comes from discrepancies in opinions, views, and misunderstandings of relationships.

Stop worrying, it's time to enjoy everything

You can stop worrying about anything: by understanding yourself, the reasons for your worries, and by shifting the direction of attention from yourself to the feelings of other people. Once you manage to listen and hear the experiences of your surroundings, it will not be difficult to stop being nervous. You will discover sensitivity in yourself, appreciate your ability to understand people by their facial expressions, and learn how pleasant it is to be useful to others with your attention and care.

Many people shared how groundless their worries and worries were, which simply delayed them and did not allow them to live in peace.

“...Thanks to the training, I truly learned what it means to live full breasts and enjoy life... Creative potential has opened up. One day I woke up, sat down at the piano and started playing! Before this, I didn’t know how to do this. At first it seemed mystical! Now I write music. The same thing happened with the talent to draw, I paint pictures. All my life I thought that I had no voice, i.e. he was pinched. Now I calmly sing any songs and am a karaoke star))). All my life I wanted to write, but I had to squeeze the text out of myself. Today I wrote my first article in English!”

“... Thanks to the knowledge of SVP, a certain understanding appears of what type this or that person belongs to, which allows you to involuntarily adapt to him in such a way that the dialogue, negotiations or performance in court becomes more effective...”

IN modern world With the accelerated pace of life, the need to constantly solve many problems and regular stressful situations, the question often arises of how to calm yourself. Not everyone has the opportunity or desire to seek help from psychologists, especially since sometimes there is simply no time for this. This article suggests effective methods, which will help you quickly calm yourself down and stop being nervous even in the most difficult situation.

8 proven ways to calm yourself:

Breathing exercises

Proper breathing can quickly change our state and restore lost calm. This method should not be neglected due to its apparent simplicity, because managing your emotions with the help of inhalations and exhalations is the basis of many spiritual practices. So, important aspect yoga are pranayama - breathing exercises calming the mind and promoting deep relaxation. Simple practices are available to every person; you just need to know certain nuances of their implementation.

Breathing on a count

A simple technique will help you achieve inner peace: counting your inhalations and exhalations. All exercises should be performed with a straight back, preferably in a sitting position. So, close your eyes, let go of all thoughts and just breathe freely. After this, begin to take a deep breath and exhale for 4 counts. It is important that the process is as smooth as possible; no discomfort should arise during the exercise. There should be no pauses after exhalation and before inhalation; breathing must be natural. You should focus on counting, trying to ignore extraneous thoughts and images. Very soon you will notice that you have been able to calm down and now look at the problem from a different angle.

Affirmation

Do you want to calm down in a stressful situation? Create an image of yourself as peaceful and relaxed. To do this, you can repeat simple affirmations - positive statements that will quickly change your mood. These phrases should not contain the word “not”; their simplicity and conciseness are also important. In this situation, the following positive statements would be ideal: “I am completely calm,” “I am happy and calm,” “I have peace and tranquility in my soul.” After just a few repetitions, you will notice that there is no trace left of the previous nervousness. The most important thing is to believe in what you say, otherwise it will be difficult to achieve the desired mood.

Contact with water

To calm your frayed nerves, you can take a shower, doing it right. Water is capable of taking on negative information and energy, so contact with this element can really help a person quickly calm down. To enhance the effect, you can ask the water to wash away all the negativity from you. In this case, it is recommended to take a shower, and with warm water, since contrast procedures can further excite the nervous system.

Observing unpleasant thoughts

To get rid of obsessive thoughts that cause anxiety, you should not try to fight them violently; it is better to use the technique of calm contemplation. Choose to practice quiet place, close your eyes and just observe your fears and worries. Do not get involved in the images that will pass before your eyes. It is important not to react to thoughts in any way, you need to allow them to simply be. There is no need for any assessments, because they are the ones that cause one or another attitude towards all phenomena. Very soon there will be pauses filled with silence. It is moments of thoughtlessness that give us the opportunity to experience the fullness of life and become who we really are.

If you manage to be an outside observer of your own thoughts, they will cease to have the same power over you. You will see that everything is not at all as you imagined. It is quite possible that the problem will resolve itself. In any case, your condition will definitely level out.

Walk

A change of activity will help change your condition, so if you are indoors, go outside and take a short walk. Fresh air and brisk walking will quickly clear unnecessary thoughts from your head and help you come to your senses.

Relaxing massage

How to calm yourself down? Do a head massage, because there are many nerve endings there, the impact of which will help change the condition. Approach this process consciously: expect that after the procedure your mood will improve and your nerves will stop acting up. After this, rub your forehead and temples with light massage movements, and also tap your fingers on the head from the forehead to the back of the head.

Pleasant smells

Healing properties essential oils make them very effective means in the fight against stress. To calm your nerves, add a couple of drops of lavender, tangerine or chamomile oil to the aroma lamp. Pleasant natural scents will help you relax and calm your nerves.

Dance improvisation

If you want to quickly calm down and relieve stress, we recommend doing movement meditation. Expressive dance will remove tension and blocks in the body and help you relax. There are no strict instructions, it is important to let your emotions go free, let them stop bothering you. Release the negativity with simple and intense movements, they can be absolutely anything: shaking, swaying or spinning. Don’t think about beauty, we are faced with another task - to calm ourselves down.

Certain techniques can help you calm down and stop being nervous, but none of them will eliminate the problem that caused the stressful situation. This is why it is important to work through your emotions and change their charge from negative to positive. One of the most negative habits is the constant feeling of guilt. This emotion is extremely destructive, as it leads to various ailments and mental disorders. As a rule, manipulators skillfully play on this feeling, because it is very easy to control a guilty person and get what you want from him. Think about it, perhaps your condition may simply be beneficial to someone, but why do you need it?

Periodic outbursts of emotions happen in the life of every person. Unfortunately, few people manage to avoid conflicts at work or at home, or simply situations that throw them off balance. Unfortunately, concepts such as “anxiety”, “worry” and “stress” have long become an integral part of our lives. At the same time, we can experience a variety of emotions - anger, irritation, fear, strong excitement bordering on panic. At such moments, we can only think about how to quickly calm down. And often, despite all the desire, it is not possible to cope with one’s own emotions.

Meanwhile, there are a number of techniques on how to quickly calm down, which psychologists advise everyone to master. The ability to control emotions is simply necessary in the modern world. Of course, we are not talking about chronic stress or depression, but in case of a sudden surge of emotions, these measures are very effective.

The most common advice that experts give is to switch attention from the traumatic situation to your own breathing. For example, take a deep breath and count to ten. It is advisable to master the method of “calming breathing”. In this case, you do not need to learn special techniques. Just control the breathing process, you can mentally say: “I take a breath, the air passes through the nose, enters the trachea, the bronchi, and the lungs.” And in reverse order: « carbon dioxide I exhale through the bronchi, trachea, nose.”

How to quickly calm down Often, during an emotional outburst, a person is overcome by strong excitement, and trembling may occur in the hands and breathing becomes difficult. There is an “express method” to cope with stress. Try to press firmly on the so-called “first aid” point, it is located above the upper lip, under the nose. It is enough to press it for 3 seconds. Massaging the anti-stress point located in the center of the chin also helps: 9 times clockwise and the same amount counterclockwise. You can also stretch each finger on your hands for 2-3 minutes.

Exists effective way, how to quickly calm down, for those who often experience attacks of irritation. In such cases, “grounding” helps. As soon as you feel irritated, grab the metal handrail with your hand, the radiator, if you are indoors, put your hands under the stream of water. You can touch the trunk of a tree, stand on the lawn (though it’s better barefoot). It takes 30 seconds to “ground” in this way. At the same time, take a sharp breath and exhale smoothly and slowly. Mentally imagine how the irritation goes into the ground and dissolves.

If circumstances allow, try it now nervous tension sit on a chair, relax and imagine a stream of water pouring on you. Take a deep breath and exhale and imagine in detail how water, starting from the top of your head, washes away all the tension from you. Let the flow go down to your feet. The exercise will take no more than 2 minutes, but the tension will noticeably decrease.

Advice for pregnant women

Pregnant women are known to be particularly susceptible to expectant mother: “I can’t calm down.” Situations that a woman did not pay attention to before can literally cause a storm of emotions during pregnancy. At the same time, many accuse themselves of incontinence and worry about the child, who may be afraid of the mother’s emotions.

Many people know firsthand that it is difficult to control oneself at this time. And psychologists do not advise expectant mothers to be too zealous in the fight against their own emotions. This will lead to nothing but additional stress. Increased emotionality during pregnancy is the norm. However, helping to quickly calm down is still necessary.

How to calm down during pregnancy? First of all, expectant mothers should also master the techniques outlined above. They will help you quickly relieve emotional stress. In addition, experts advise talking to the baby more often, explaining to him the reasons for the mother’s bad mood, this will help calm both of them down. The main thing is to understand that to completely protect the child from negative emotions is impossible, and the guilt you feel actually causes him no less distress than outbursts of emotion.

Well, in order to get irritated over trifles as little as possible, take more walks. fresh air, master relaxation techniques, devote a few minutes a day to meditation and auto-training, or take up yoga for pregnant women.

Instructions

Quite often there are people who strive to control the actions of the people around them. For an external observer, behavior can manifest itself both in a total desire to help everyone and everything, to do everything for others, in unwillingness and inability to perform duties to subordinates, or take the form of persistent interference in attempts to control it, to be in the center of current events. In such cases they often say about people: “Sticking their nose into someone else’s business.” The roots of this behavior lie in character traits and individual personality that appear in the process of social interaction. Self-doubt, which manifests itself as distrust of other people and becomes a source of constant self-affirmation through the desire to be in the center of events, is what probable problem problem that needs to be solved in order to stop worrying about everything.

Another constant experience often comes down not to external manifestation, and to internal state person. Such a person cannot stop worrying about everything that happens to him. He is unfamiliar with situations and non-standard solutions. He is influenced by other people's opinions. He constantly has people evaluating him, even in situations where such an evaluation is not expected at all. He is unstable, depending on the opinions of others. The root of this behavior, again, is a lack of self-confidence.

Surprisingly, in both situations described with such different social manifestations, the root of eternal experiences is a person’s own lack of confidence in himself and his abilities. It is this quality of character that all those who want to finally stop worrying about everything and learn to see the world from a position of confidence and calm will have to work with.

Sources:

• how can I stop worrying

Each of us had to worry. Most often, the causes of such emotions are uncertainty or dissatisfaction with oneself or a certain situation. Coping with yourself and stopping worrying in vain is actually not that difficult.

Instructions

Feelings are a natural reaction human psyche to current events. However, excessive sensitivity and inability to stop in time can lead to stress and nervous breakdowns. Therefore, the main thing is to learn to maintain a reasonable balance even over trifles.
Anyone can stop worrying; to do this, you need to learn to control your thoughts and be able to soberly assess the real significance of what is happening. Learn to notice the feeling of anxiety at the very beginning, analyze it soberly, exclude everything that is not essential and add positive attitudes.

To stop worrying in vain, first of all you need to try to soberly assess the cause itself and its possible consequences. Imagine the worst that could happen because of your mistake (real or imaginary) and “try on” the resulting situation. This will help the psyche get rid of worries, since the brain will consider “terrible” events to have already taken place, that is, “spent” material.

In the life of any person there are important and responsible moments that will make even the most morally stable person nervous and worried. This is not a deviation from the norm, since stress is also a function of the body, and a protective one. When experiencing stress, your brain sheds some of its responsibilities: thought processes and coordination deteriorate, you find it difficult to accept important decisions. But at the same time, you get a small rush of adrenaline, which makes you nervously shake your leg or quickly finger your fingers. It's normal to be nervous, but if you can ruin an important meeting with your condition, or signs of anxiety appear too often, you need to start solving this problem immediately.

How to stop being nervous and calm down quickly

Suppose you came to important interview, or again find yourself in exams on which your fate depends. Scary? Of course. Any person, realizing the significance of the situation, will begin to get nervous and panic. For quick removal anxiety, there are several techniques that will relieve symptoms: they will calm your breathing, normalize your heart rhythm, and help coordination.

Breathing technique

This method is even offered experienced psychologists at their sessions. The point is to gradually calm your breathing, then your pulse will begin to return to normal. Once you feel better, you can put your thoughts in order and gather your strength.

• Start counting down the seconds slowly.
• Slowly exhale all the air from your lungs for four seconds.
• Hold your breath for the next two seconds.
• Inhale as deeply as possible for four seconds.
• Hold your breath again for two seconds.

This type of breathing should be maintained for as long as possible. The effect will not come immediately, give your body time. Five minutes will be more than enough.

Focus on other things

If the feeling of concern comes on suddenly: during work or at home, do not let your emotions ruin your relationships with your loved ones. Concentrate your attention on other things, for example, look for a person you don’t know well and observe what he is doing and why. As a pleasant bonus, you will learn a lot of new things about the people around you.

Especially for such cases, many people find a hobby: something entertaining and frivolous. You can try to throw a coin from one finger to another, or hide a card like a magician. There are even professional classes for spinning a pen between your fingers, which is called handspinning. Just try to take a break from the hustle and bustle around you and immerse yourself in your own affairs.

Just dream

This method will not work if you are at an interview or other important meeting: you cannot dream here, you will be misunderstood. But if you cannot calm down in your daily routine, when you are very excited about something, then just put everything aside for a couple of minutes. Imagine what you want: just a little change. Maybe it will be ice cream, or a family weekend, enslaving the world or your own helicopter. Think about whatever you want. In a few minutes you will understand how much more interesting there is in life, besides your subject of excitement.

How to become calmer and not be nervous

Any techniques and exercises are only relieving the symptoms of the main problem. Relying on them is like taking painkillers for deep caries. If you get nervous often, then you need to see a doctor. Unfortunately, in the CIS countries and, in particular, in our country, the practice of turning to a psychologist and psychotherapist is not yet widespread. Meanwhile, your psychological problems easily lead to physical ones. They only accumulate with age, which makes the situation worse.

Think, perhaps you can’t calm down because something is gnawing at you from the inside: an unresolved quarrel, resentment, an unkept promise. You need to resolve all the problems that could cause this condition and only then will you become calm.